Posted by
LadyLiberty on Friday, June 13, 2008 1:49:08 PM
Episode 41: Honor to our Faithful Fathers
(This Father's Day Dedicated to the Boy Scouts of America: Honorable, prepared.)
Olam: (Walking with Jake on the shores of Lake Michigan) So when are your Eagles going to fly to Nebraska?
Jake: Today. I'll be back for Link's wedding on Sunday. Gonna have to miss the bachelor party tonight.
Olam: Honor was given to our fathers by these boy scouts who prepared themselves accordingly. So, first honor the honorably prepared. Then return and shed that light on any oversleeping bachelors.
Jake: I fear that some of the sons may think that they were not prepared for the whirlwind that hit them and that they failed their fallen brothers.
Olam: Can the children of the bride chamber mourn, as long as the bridegroom is with them?
You can take the boy scout from his honorable home, but you can't take the honorable home from the boy scout.
Does preparation in this life mean that one will never meet with sorrow?
Jake: No, but when the best and the brightest stars fall, many wonder what's the use and purpose of such a life. Seems so random and unforgiving.
Olam: Well, many have forsaken the navigation of stars in favor of the perfect earthly eternity that defies any risk or dead reckoning. Any wonder that it is they who have become the walking dead?
But honor lives in an honest assessment of nature, both without and within. Honor lives in accordance with those conditions that can't be changed. Honor lives in a discernment between those means to which we are capable of adhering and the ends that blow beyond our kith and kin.
To a generation raised up to believe that Man created this world, that he can perfect it according to his whims and preferences, and being all-powerful, can destroy it by the same moving targets of his own convenient lies feigning inconvenient truths--from this life now standing squarely in his way--a sorrowful, but natural reordering should be a mystifying, humbling contrition.
So what's the place of the human mind in all of that? Look no farther than the Boy Scouts of America for the answer. For when a rain-wrapped tornado strikes you faster than the highest-speed radar screen is capable of detecting for warn of shelter, then put to bear your years of preparing for the sake of this moment.
When downed trees forestall emergency services, form triage units and save the wounded yourselves. When even the Ranger's house is destroyed, and only you and yours can come to his family's rescue, then do your duty.
Rush to save as many as you are capable of saving, but stand your shaken ground when the bridegroom escorts the rest of the company from the campground.
Can a whirlwind light your lamp anymore than a sun can stop its cycling spots?
Jake: No. (head bowed)
Olam: All 98 scouts and staff are home where they belong. And the bridegroom will be with you for the wedding.
Jake: Very well, old friend...of youthful spirit.
(Later that night at Link's bachelor party.)
Link: All right now, I'm not messin' wichya so lissen up! Lissen to your amirable admiral.
Bachelors, buddies and mates: (Saluting sloppily) Yo, amirable!
Link: Now, sing it from the bottom of your hearts this time, mates. We ain't ready for prime time.
All: (singing heartily) Whaduya do with a drunken sailor, whaduya do with a drunken sailor, whaduya do with a drunken sailor early in the morning? There she goes (all drink)
Link: And up she rises! (drinks)
All: Thar she blows! (all drink)
Link: And up he rises! (drinks)
All: Early in the morning!! (hearty laughter all around)
Link: Ok. I believe this here choir is fussiciently tuned. I will now dial my bride and we shall sing high the mastheads for her serenede. Squared up, sailors?
All: Squared up! Anchors aweigh. (Link punches the keys)
Ann: (foggy throated) Helloooooo? Link? What time is it?
Link: Ooh...(to the celebrants) she wants to know what time it is. Whose got the time?
Ann: Link...for God's sake it's 3 AM. What are you doing? Hasn't that party ended?
Something that can make you do right, make you do wrong...wait a minute..somthin's goin' wrong. Someone's on the phone. Three o'clock in the morning, talkin' 'bout how she can make it right...?
Ann: I'm not gonna make anything right if you keep doin' me wrong. Now you've got a wedding, day after next, mister. I'd suggest you put it to rest right about now. (Hangs up)
Link: Uh oh...is there a sober sailor in the house? Let him rise to the occasion.
A sober sailor: Sir. On my honor I can serve thee well. What are your orders?
Link: Get me the ladder from my garage. Hoist the sails, and anchors aweigh to my betrothed. We shall have to serenede her in person. Are you prepared, mates? So I can keep my mate?
All: Prepared! Sir!
Link: Now I ain't messin' wichya. Raise those trumpets!
(horn section holds 'em high)
Good! Horns and ladder, my band of brothers. Aweigh!
(In short order they arrive noisily at Ann's for a pre-nuptual serenede)
Link: Lemme hear the horn section!
(Horns lead in)
Link: Sweeeet! (sings out as if he's Pastor Green himself climbing Jacob's ladder)
I'm so tired of being alone, I'm so tired of on my own. Won't you help me, girl, as soon as you can?
Ann: (raises up her window and stares out in astonishment) What in Heaven's name? You climbing Jake's ladder?
Link: No, honey, it's all my own.
Timeus: Link! Come down here. We serenede on dry land better. Come on down, buddy.
Tu: Mister Link. You need to conduct us. We forget our lyrics, please!
Link: Ok, mates, ok. I'm coming on down (wobbles his way to earth as the mates hold on) Ready now? Rippppp it!
Band in chorus: I!
Link: My, my, my!
Band in chorus: Ohhhh, I!
Link: Can turn a grey sky blue. You see, I can make it rain when I want to.
Band: Ohhhh, I!
Link: can build a castle from a single grain of sand...
Ann: Oh? And where'd you get that little ol' grain of sand?
Link: Now, hold on. You see, I can make a ship sail on dry land, children, yeah.
Ann: Some rig.
Link: Uh, huh, brothers, all the powers that I possess, (looks at Ann) but girl, I can't get next to you!
Ann: Not until you speak those vows, beloved. Something that'll make you do right.
Link: You promise, me Ann? (He calls out) I've got witnesses. Cuz, you know, Ann,
I can think of younger days
when living for my life
was everything a man could want to do.
I could never see tomorrow
I was never told about the sorrow...
And how can you mend a broken heart?
How can you stop the rain from falling down?
How can you stop the sun from shining?
What makes the world go 'round?
Ann, how can you mend this broken man?
How can a loser ever win?
Somebody please, help me mend my broken heart
And let me live again.
Ann: All right. You win. I promise you, Link...now go home and sleep it off.
Link: Baby, that's my American dream. Can't be sleeping it off! I came to pursue it, and I have conquered!
Ann: Then all hail the conquering hero!
Band: All hail!!! (Band strikes up, singing)
All: Love and happiness. Love and happiness. (They sing as they wobble their way to the waiting cars and home.)